Thursday, September 28, 2006

Ugly Pants

I did it this morning. I finally broke down and wore a pair of stretchy pants my mom talked me into buying when I was early in my pregnancy.
They aren’t maternity. They are just awful.
Remember those dorky stretchpants your 3rd grade teacher used to wear? Well if you take those, mix them with those leisure suit double-knit polyester styles from the 70's (without the bell-bottoms) and make them a tan color, then you can probably picture how ugly these bottoms really are.
At least they aren’t double-knit polyester. They’re an almost as awful thick stretchy knit material.
They also aren’t clingy and tight. They’re kind of baggy, but taper at the ankles, which just makes my legs look wider (the ice cream cone effect ala What Not to Wear. )
On top of all this, they are fairly short – hitting right at the top of my foot. This means I can’t even try to dress them up with heels or anything.
One of us isn’t complaining though. Little Elvis kicked and poked me all day yesterday. Today, the baby has been much less aggressive. This has made my bladder happier as well.
I’ll try to remember how happy the baby is each time I walk by a mirror or look at my lap today. Maybe that will help me forget my vanity.
Any of you battling with this? I hate to wish ugly clothes on anyone, but would like to know that I’m not alone in this land of stretchy, shapeless slacks.