Wednesday, February 03, 2010

How do you not cry at a parent/teacher conference

Little Elvis will be a big 3-year-old in a week. It's amazing how much he's grown and accomplished since last year.

The twos, they were not always easy around here. But we've seen glimpses of the threes and are optimistic.

Bob and I were talking last week about how much we like the little guy that Little Elvis is becoming. He's funny, silly, sweet, extremely loving, smart, demanding and stubborn as all get-out.

He's full of hugs, loves and kisses. Every night he expects (demands) that I snuggle with him. He wants to snuggle in his bed and "talk about the day."

Little Elvis will usually tell me at least once a day that he loves me. It's not in response to my telling him. He will just feel the need to come up, hug me and say, "I love you."

On Monday I had a parent-teacher conference with his pre-school teacher. He's not even three.

I went in expecting them to tell me about my bad parenting -- did he repeat a word I shouldn't have said in front of him?

Instead they presented me with a list of his "quirks." Some of the things were things I think every preschooler does -- he's impulsive and repeats himself.

Some things we've been working on -- he's quite the close talker with other kids.

One thing we assumed he inherited from his Daddy -- walking on his toes sometimes.

And three things we had never noticed -- he stays in his own world, doesn't make eye contact and will hold things and stare off into space.

Lots of issues immediately jumped into my head and I teared up. They said they think he's language delayed and I need to get him tested so they can start to "fix" him before these habits set in. (They didn't say fix, but that's what they meant.)

Little Elvis often engages us in conversation, and he does with other people as well. And the only time he won't make eye contact with me is when I'm scolding him. I don't even know what to say about the final thing. He's never done that around us.

Little Elvis is speaking in sentences now and using the correct tense and proper words a lot of the time. We are so proud of his accomplishments.

I've made the recommended calls and they are going to get us an appointment when they can fit us in. My parents think it's bunk. I talked to Little Elvis' nursery teacher at church. She doesn't think anything is wrong, either, though she did say he was high-strung. She had also never witnessed some of the issues.

We plan on getting him tested. I know his preschool teachers know a whole lot more about this stuff than we do, and I respect that.

Every night this week at bed, we're not only talking about the day (and not getting so close to people we don't know.) I'm also telling him how proud I am of him. What a good boy he is. How smart he is. How sweet he is.

He's heard these things before, but not always at night, when it's quiet and dark. When he's not distracted by toys or books or his brother.

Little Elvis is an amazing little boy and I want to make sure he knows it.


Blogger lisa said...

Follow your instincts, and do what you guys think is best. They might know a lot, but you and Bob know best.

6:14 PM  
Blogger Lisa @ Boondock Ramblings said...

Don't worry too much until you have him tested. I can tell he's an awesome little boy from what I read. I'm sure the teachers just want to help you and Elvis work through anything that might cause him some delays later on.

6:23 PM  
Blogger Lainey-Paney said...

I can imagine that this is a worrisome burden.

11:32 AM  
Blogger Kristi said...

I've always thought that parents know a child best. I would get him evaluated (which is what I did with the twins when their pediatrician suggested that Luci might have a gross motor delay when she wasn't crawling on all fours at 12 months) just for peace-of-mind. It could be something very minor, or it could be nothing at all.

Thinking of you...

7:13 AM  
Blogger Tracey - Just Another Mommy Blog said...

He IS amazing. He's your baby. And no matter what any teacher or doctor ever "determines" about him, he is unique because there isn't anyone like him since the beginning or until the end of time. Keep that in your head.

I've been through the tearful parent-teacher conversations. I BAWLED just last year (as in, tears and snot and shaking. Good times...) Nothing is harder to hear than someone else telling you that they don't think your kid is as amazing and wonderful as you KNOW he is.

1:08 AM  
Blogger mpotter said...

i'm sorry. i know it must be hard to hear.
kudos to you for trusting in the teachers.... AND for making your own conclusions.

i think everyone working together will be best for Little Elvis.

good luck on the screenings and such. hope it all comes out for the best!
and no matter what screenings/assessments may end up telling you, it's great to know that you KNOW him. and nothing changes from the way he is TODAY.

keep strong. & enjoy him. as always.

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